Persevering Through Pain

GOD’S PROMISE:

Do not be conformed to this world,

but be transformed by the renewing of your mind,

that you may prove what the will of God is,

that which is good and acceptable and perfect.

– Romans 12:2

MY PRAYER: Father,

I do not simply believe I have been mistreated,

I know I have been mistreated,

And You know I have been wronged as well.

I’ve told You what happened repeatedly.

Everybody in my life knows my story.

Now that it has been a while since my wounding,

All of my friends seem to have progressed

With their lives—everybody except for me.

I remain stuck in my debilitating mindset,

Which has not changed appreciably,

Despite the passage of so much time.

It’s infuriating and unfair that I am the only one

Who continues to experience such pain.

Those who used, misused, and discarded me

Should be the ones to suffer, but they are not.

At least, I can’t tell that they have.

I’m the one whose stomach churns in anger,

As I languish in resentment and bitter despair,

Refusing to move forward with my life.

I know I’m not hurting my abusers—not one bit.

I’m only hurting myself, and those around me.

It doesn’t seem fair—not fair at all,

But I can no longer continue living this way.

I refuse to waste my future nursing bitterness,

Rehashing my drama repeatedly in my mind,

But it’s going to be difficult to put my pain aside.

I didn’t realize I had drifted so far from You.

I didn’t consider how willful I had become,

But now I do. It becomes clearer to me each day.

I have blamed others for my plight for so long,

That resentment seems normal—even comfortable.

This frightens me for what lies ahead for me in life.

Show me how to find my way back to You.

Because, without Your active, healing guidance,

My life will never again amount to anything of value,

Amen.

MY SLOGAN: A winner is a loser who keeps trying.

MY AFFIRMATIONS:

—I will not waste my future by dwelling on my mistreatment.

—Having been forgiven much, I choose to forgive others.

—I will move forward with my life, thanking God each day.

—I will renew my mind continuously, affirming my love for others.

MY MEDITATION: Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, let your mind dwell on these things (Philippians 4:8.)

MY JOURNAL:

I have been stuck in my anger and cannot move forward with my life. This is the reason why:

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These three issues have caused me a great deal of pain:

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My mind needs renewal in these three areas:

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To move forward, I need to be forgiving, including the following situations:

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