My thoughts began to swirl around me as I paced the floor with a baby on my hip. I feel trapped…I have to get out of here…Where is he?…He is always late…
The accusations began to build momentum with the ticking of the clock. By the time my husband walked in the door, I jammed the baby in his arms and ran out. oh, the joy of a walk! all by myself! no one pulling on me…crying…needing something.
He has no idea how this feels…I am going crazy…When do I have any time for me…
Being a mom can vacillate between the sweetness of hugs and kisses to feeling like you are in jail. Taking care of children at home may have meant that you gave up your job and income. As moms we have less time, less money, and often less encouragement. if you are like me, your face hasn’t had make-up on it in days. in the early days of motherhood you are lucky if you get a shower. You have to lock the door to go to the bathroom alone.
Feeling trapped often prompts us to blame someone else for our plight. You may blame your kids. You may blame your husband, who gets to go to work every day. Or if your husband stays home, you may still blame him because you have to work. You think back to when you had prayed for a child. You asked God for this. Ugh! If you had only known about the constant frustrations.
Of course, there are the other times when the sweetness of being together fills your love tank until it overflows with good thoughts and good memories. Your child falls asleep in your arms. The purity of the moment floods you with joy.
Are moms schizophrenic? How can you feel like the most blessed woman in the world one day, and the next moment you are a ranting lunatic?
What is going on? Is this motherhood? I thought it would be so much more. Why didn’t anyone tell me it would be this hard?
You are not going Crazy
This sweet wonderful roller-coaster ride called motherhood takes many twists and turns as you nurture your children to adulthood. The good news is, you are not going crazy. You are just a mom who is being pulled in lots of directions.
So buckle your seatbelt, throw up your hands, and laugh rather than scream. The trials of today will quickly pass and the sweet fragrance of your baby in your arms will be but a memory. Enjoy your journey.
This Blog is an excerpt from Sue Detweiler’s book 9 Traits of a Life-Giving Mom available in a bookstore near you.
Read more encouragement by Sue Detweiler in Overcome the Invisible Struggle Every Mom Faces
Sue Detweiler is a gifted bible teacher, speaker, writer, and radio host. Known for her transparency and honesty, she helps women and men fulfill their potential in Christ. Sue’s focus in Sonoma Christian Home is to blog on “The Life-Giving Mom” Married and in ministry for 29 years with 6 children, Sue has a heart to help connect people to their purpose.
You can listen to her 30 minute weekly interviews at Christian Mom Talk
Click here to learn more about Sue Detweiler