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Erica Galindo
Celebrating Food, Faith and Family
Last edited on: August 13, 2014.

You sign the divorce papers. You move to separate houses. Life goes on. You expect to exhale a sigh of relief, yet then comes the difficult work of co-parenting . . . and it’s not as easy as you anticipated.


If you and your ex-spouse find yourselves arguing over pick-up times, bedtimes or quality times, then read on for some guidelines. These four tips will help you and your ex-spouse successfully co-parent your kids . . . the most important people in the equation.



Let Go of the Past

Mistakes were made. Yet now is not the time to rehash or place blame. Now is the time to let go of bitterness and anger from the past for both your sake and your child’s. Resist name-calling or talking negatively about your ex-spouse, especially in front of your child. Stop wallowing in feelings of resentment and begin focusing on a more promising future.


“Therefore, rid yourselves of all malice and all

deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander of every kind.”

– 1 Peter 2:1, NIV



Forgive One Another

After you let go of things from the past, you will be able to move into the forgiveness stage. Pray God would give you the strength to forgive your spouse—and yourself—for mistakes made.

“Be kind and compassionate to one another,

forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

– Eph 4:32, NIV


Use Each Other’s Strengths

Accept the fact that your spouse will not do things exactly the way you want them done. Your son might not return home with his lunch box washed out. Your daughter might not practice her soccer skills at mom’s house. Yet the kids come home with something more valuable . . . time spent with their parent.


Each parent brings a different skill set to the table. Instead of getting bogged down in what your spouse doesn’t do, try to embrace and appreciate the unique qualities of your ex-spouse.


“Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others,

as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.”

– 1 peter 4:10, NIV



Be Flexible

Life with children is anything but predictable. Kids get sick. Soccer practice gets cancelled. Choir rehearsal gets moved to Wednesday. Parents need to learn how to communicate, work well with one another, and be flexible. Work together, not against one another. The sooner parents learn this, the easier the transition into co-parenting.


“Carry each other’s burdens,

and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.”

~ Galatians 6:2, NIV










Elizabeth Oates is a wife, mother of three, and an author, blogger, and speaker who encourages, inspires, and equips a new generation of women seeking a deeper relationship with Christ. She is a cliché Generation Xer from a broken home who once searched for purpose and significance apart from Jesus Christ. Today she devotes her life to spreading the message that we are not defined by our past; our God is bigger than our broken family trees and stronger than the sins that weigh us down. She graduated from Dallas Theological Seminary and co-founded Project Restoration Ministry. To learn more about Elizabeth or receive her weekly blog, please visit


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